Live For Little Moments

Seriously playing Summertime by Kenny Chesney, Our Song by Taylor Swift and I Was Made For Sunny Days by The Weepies over and over and over.

My logic seems to be that if I internalize them, they can act as talismans against anything unhappy in my summer.  Three hour maxi-prep at work? Wa-cha! Hadouken! "It's a smile, it's a kiss, it's a sip of wine, it's a summertime!"  Same old argument with the rents? BAM! "I was riding shotgun with my hair undone in the front seat of his car."

Instantly transported to an internal place where the sun is warm on my skin, my suit is wet underneath an old sundress, my face freckled and my hair damp, wavy and messy, flying around my face from the wind blowing through the open windows, wafting the smell of chlorine around the car....sigh.  I breathe deeply, and I don't let it go.  Then I open my eyes and all is rosier.

 I also think I need to make sleep a priority; I think I've gotten like 12 hours this entire week.  I am just trying to manage working all day with having a "social life."  Plus, I wanted to see L-Rager, and since she was leaving, well, time was limited. 

In other news, I'm very bummed out still over events of a long time ago.  I don't know what the cure is to this, because it's not even a real affliction.  I just want to not care, but I can't.  But I think it has much more to do with me in this situation AGAIN, than me in the situation to begin with.  Does that make sense?

I could really go for a hazelnut latte right now...

Two Things

I really didn't care anyway.

And I guess this is me getting what I deserve.  Karma's a bitch.

Maybe I'll go work tomorrow.  I think that's probably the life I want.  Working all the time.  No time for a boyfriend or family.  It will give me purpose.

Sigh.

Once more, with a twist

I stopped writing bad screenplays, I really did.  And the idea of a real relationship was even scarier. Woops, back to the former.

Prendiamo pillole per la felicità (misericordia)

When did everything become so surreal?  I like this song quite a bit.